Offensive ******mas Carols
As I was surfing the web a few days ago, I came across an article written by Spunky Junior.
A group of public schooled students, offended by the many references to the first Advent of Christ in the traditional carol “Silent Night”, have created their own version:
Cold in the night,
no one in sight,
winter winds whirl and bite,
how I wish I were happy and warm,
safe with my family out of the storm.
Even though I am personally unoffended by references to Christ, I applaud these students for their unflinching tenacity in not tolerating things that offend them.
I also have a carol that contains words offensive to me. The verse in the popular “Jingle Bells” contains references to horses and snow simultaneously. This is something that I simply cannot stomach, as I have had past bad experiences with both equestrian mammals and snow. So I have exercised my freedoms as well and composed my own variation:
Dashing through the dirt
On a pair of broken skis
Flying through the woods
Bouncing off of treesThen ahead I see
A skier’s greatest fear
Off the cliff with a hi-de-ho
My last jump of the yearOh, Jingle Bells
As I fell
Whistling through the air
Landing in a briar patch
But no one even caredOh, Jingle Bells
Now I tell
Why I never ski
Since that day
I’ve had no way
To stand on my own two feet.
Never allow yourself to be offended!
In Him,
D3
[Disclaimer: the above statements are primarily satirical in nature.]
Kristin said,
December 25, 2005 at 11:22 pm
I like your version of “Jingle Bells” David! Very creative
Merry Christmas!!
Travis said,
December 30, 2005 at 6:08 am
ROFLOL! That was great David!
Anonymous said,
March 9, 2006 at 5:03 am
golly, you are so religiously intolerant. why do you make fun of people just because they are of a different faith?
JONATHON P cooper said,
January 29, 2007 at 4:45 pm
AWESOME!
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